This semi-literate poster appeared out of
nowhere on August 23, 2001
WANTED
NAME: Pelicus alpha
Aliases: The one true pelican; ur-pelican; jaquint’s
lost charge; that gay pelican
that will fly off with anyone
Species:
pelecanus occidentalis, although
inexplicably wearing whiteface
Last seen: Wilmington,
NY, Friday august 3, 2001, sporting a prodigious array of neckwear and a
piss-yellow shirt that said socal rugby referees society
Possible
whereabouts: being a waterfowl, will most likely will have crossed a major body
of water from last known location
If seen: provide
with fish to win confidence. Contact dave Jaquint or ed todd, who are
duty-bound to fly to the pelican’s location to retrieve him
This page was
last updated on August 23, 2001.